no more goodbyes

2011-12-12T22:55:00.012+08:00

Cambodia mission trip 7/12/2011- 11/12/2011 (with BRMC)

Overall, was just an amazing experience. We bought loads of different medicines, held a medical clinic for the people who lived in the village of Prek Toa, did several home visits, organised a Christmas party for the kindergarten and gave the kids loads of x'mas prezzies!

Some memorable events:

1. Visiting the homes of some of the people who go to Prek Toa Methodist Church (planted by BRMC) and who have children who go to our kindergarten. Pictures speak a thousand words.

Uncle Michael brought along some cars and pens for the kids and I remember there was once when I saw a small little boy standing outside in the open field, waving and smiling at me. I couldn't help but give him a car- and the look on his face was just priceless. At first there was no reaction as he stared at the car. Then suddenly he looked super shocked and he started jumping up and down and screaming, with a look of pure joy on his beautiful face. Omg. Never expected such a reaction; never knew one tiny toy car could mean so much to anyone.

And then before I knew it, news broke out among the kids and a swarm of kids- from nowhere- were suddenly running towards us, asking for toys! I was so stunned, I didn't know how to react and couldn't even bring myself to move! Until Uncle Michael 'rescued' me, took the bags from my hands and told me to follow the rest of our group and just keep walking. And then they swarmed him and he couldn't bear to just reject them and leave them. So we gave each one of them a pen/car (according to their gender), and moved on, with a bag almost completely void of gifts, and a few houses more to visit!

2. Medical clinic

The patients that came were all very patient and thankful- and praise God, we had 400+ people come in! Hopefully all 400 were blessed by our work. The team worked hard all afternoon and were all so knackered by the end of the day, the leaders decided to call off the nightly de-brief! For the first time in my life, I will also lose my voice completely the next day. I had actually already developed a slightly croaky throat before the clinic, and it just deteriorated throughout the day. I was at the dispensary/pharmacy section, given the task of explaining (through a translator) to each patient each medicine as well as the dosage of each, before handing over the medicines. Talking beneath a mask in a room full of people also made it more exertive I guess.

3. The people

The Cambodians are amazing amazing people. Very gentle and patient and polite. Even in public places, be it on the roads or markets, the people are generally unexpectedly friendly and courteous! I say "unexpectedly" because Cambodia (specifically, Phnom Penh) is a very busy city which reminds me somewhat of China. And normally in busy cities the people aren't very nice.. Hehe. Anyway the traffic conditions and congestions in Cambodia are crazy. Worse than in Shanghai. I recall fearing for my life every time I crossed a road in Shanghai when I was there in August. But Phnom Penh is on a totally different level! Usually we had to wait for the bus driver to lead and direct us when crossing roads! Although, the good thing about Cambodia is that although the roads are incredible messy and chaotic, the drivers are actually rather courteous (and skilful at avoiding moving and non-moving obstructions).

The kids. What can I say? Such amazing people, with beautiful faces and smiles, always smiling and waving, pure in heart, really warm, sweet and playful. I think they are the ones that I will miss the most. When I was with the Methodist Welfare Services, I always relied on talking to get along with the kids, play with them, and help them. But this time, my lack of voice forced me to become more hands-on and it taught me many things. It was also when I got my hands dirty that I had the most fun with the kids. They are such amazing people who deserve more than the living conditions that they are under. If Singaporean kids are missing something, it has gotta be the ability and willingness to be contented with what they have. These kids have hardly anything, but if you were to just look at their smiling faces and the way they behaved around you and interacted with you, you would never have guessed that they live in houses on an underdeveloped ex-dump site, with muddy water everywhere, lacking drinking water, lacking cement floors, lacking stable roofs that don't sound like they are gonna collapse at any moment each time the wind blows.... and the list goes on.

What can we do to help these people to live under better conditions? The process will definitely take time but I do hope that one day, the village of Prek Toa will be a totally different place, with poverty as its history and opportunities as its future.

I will miss you loads, Prek Toa!

2011-10-20T23:15:00.001+08:00

I have moved!

www.rhshee.blogspot.com

2011-09-24T17:18:00.000+08:00

Will you help me fall apart
Pick me up, take me in your arms
Find my way back from the storm
And you show me how to grow

I am holding on to the hope I have inside
With you I will stay through every day
Putting my understanding aside

2011-09-24T17:15:00.001+08:00

Would you change me from
Who I've been lately?
'Cause I know I'm nothing
Without you
Would you save me from
The way I've been lately?
'Cause I can't see living
Without you

2011-01-10T00:41:00.001+08:00

“What we are is God’s gift to us. What we become is our gift to God.” ~Eleanor Powell

2011-01-10T00:26:00.000+08:00

What do we want more than anything else for our families? We want unity and harmony, love and support. Right? That’s why it hurts so much when there is division, estrangement, and hostility among family members. During one such difficult time in our family, I hurried to my pastor for counsel.

“My most fervent prayer is for peace in my family,” I said.

“Jesus doesn’t promise this,” my pastor answered. “He promises peace in your heart but not peace in all your relations. It is impossible to live without hurt and disappointment in human relationships. Children hurt parents; parents hurt children. That’s life. If we cling to hurt and bitterness, we give Satan the key to our house. Only Jesus gives you all of His attention all of the time. Only Jesus understands all of your needs and can respond in perfect faithfulness.”

“How do I reach my children at this time?” I asked.

“Your influence will come out of your personal walk with God,” my pastor smiled. “Leave them in God’s hands, practice forgiveness on a daily basis, and keep communication lines open.”

Acting upon my pastor’s wise counsel, my daily prayer became: “Lord Jesus, help me to release my children into Your loving hands. I want Your grace to flow through me to them. I want to give them time and space to process what’s happening in our family right now. I will wait patiently for healing to come to each of us. I will resist the primary urge to jump in and fix it with much talking. May my words bless my children and not condemn them, so that they can grow and become the persons You want them to be.”

Letting go of expectations sets you free and it sets your children free. Without the baggage of resentment, God can do His work of restoration.

written by Helen Grace Lescheid

2010-12-16T21:15:00.000+08:00

Some hope in what their eyes can see
We hope in the glorious unseen
In a risen and returning King

Some are chasing the treasures of this world
We run to a glorious reward
The only Name worth living for!

Say, Say, Say you believe it
Sing for the whole world to hear it
We know and we declare it, Jesus is King
Say, Say, Say you believe it
Sing loud, sing like you mean it
We know and we declare it, Jesus is King
Say! Say!

We set our hearts on what will last
Your words, Your love, Your faithfulness
Our hope is built on nothing less
We open wide our mouths to praise
Let this generation raise
A song of freedom all our days!

2010-12-16T20:59:00.001+08:00

Jesus, You alone shall
be my first love,
my first love.
The secret place and the highest praise
shall be Yours,
shall be Yours.

To Your throne I'll bring devotion,
may it be the sweetest sound.
Lord this heart is reaching for You now

So I'll set my sights upon You,
Set my life upon Your praise,
Never looking to another way.
You alone will be my passion,
Jesus, You will be my song.
You will find me longing after You.

Day and night I lift my eyes
to seek You,
to seek You.
Hungry for a glimpse of You
in glory,
in glory.

:D

2010-08-14T16:45:00.004+08:00

So this is it,
This is where it all begins.
This is where you draw the line,
This is where the old you ends, gets left behind

Welcome to forever,
this is where you disappear,
And you come alive!
All you ever wanted,
Only love could lead you here… Hello to goodbye.

So this is life,
Life is in the letting go,
Life is in the sacrifice,
Life is when you lose control.

Welcome to forever,
This is where you disappear and you come alive.
All you ever wanted,
Only love could lead you here,
Hello to Goodbye.

Goodbye
Goodbye
Hello to Goodbye.

2010-08-14T15:47:00.001+08:00

You were all the things I thought I knew
And I thought we could be

And all of the memories, so close to me, just fade away
All this time you were pretending
So much for my happy ending.

2010-07-02T12:31:00.002+08:00

or maybe there are things you can't see
and all those things are happening
to bring a better ending
someday, somehow you'll see, you'll see.

would you dare, would you dare to believe?

2010-06-29T21:59:00.001+08:00

But on the inside, I can hear her saying...

Lead me with strong hands
Stand up when I can't
Don't leave me hungry for love
Chasing dreams, but what about us?

2010-04-26T19:54:00.001+08:00

and i wanna believe you

2010-03-23T21:35:00.001+08:00

And as I look upon your name
Circumstances fade away

Even if my world falls I will say
Above all, I live for your glory

With all my heart I'll say
I'm living for your name
With all to give you praise
We're living for your glory Lord

2010-02-24T05:51:00.001+08:00

this is how i know what love is
this is how i know i’m free
this is how i know salvation
Jesus came and died for me

this is why i come to worship
this is why i lift my hands
this is why i now surrender
everything i am

because of Your love,
there is dancing in my heart
because Your grace, i am free
because of Your faithfulness
there’s a song that must be sung
and i will sing, i will sing because of You

this is why there’s joy within me
this is why my spirit sings
Jesus You’re my great adventure
You’re my everything

You came to save the world,
to save the world, to save the world…

Your love can change the world
can change the world, can change the world…

2010-02-24T05:24:00.001+08:00

Colossians 3

Rules for Holy Living

¹Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. ²Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. ³For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. ⁴When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.

⁵Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry. ⁶Because of these, the wrath of God is coming. ⁷You used to walk in these ways, in the life you once lived. ⁸But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips. ⁹Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices ¹⁰and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator. ¹¹Here there is no Greek or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave or free, but Christ is all, and is in all.

¹²Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. ¹³Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. ¹⁴And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

¹⁵Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. ¹⁶Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. ¹⁷And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

2010-02-24T04:46:00.000+08:00

Is it unfair to say that You are leading,
Then try and face this mountain on my own,
Why am I scared, I've never stopped believing,
And You have never left me all alone.
Well, I can get ahead of where you've led me to,
But I will trust Your heart enough to wait for You ...

Until this mountain moves,
Until the path is clear,
Until Your voice is the only one I can hear.
Until I see Your hand,
Until I know Your heart,
Until I trust the grace that's carried me this far
I will be still, until ...

How could I have never seen this coming,
It's not like I've been running from Your will,
Tell me why each day's another mystery,
Waiting for Your truth to be revealed,
I try to tell my heart to trust what I believe,
And wait on You through all of my uncertainty ...

Be still my heart of worry,
Be still my restless soul,
Be confident and certain,
Be still and know

2010-02-23T02:38:00.002+08:00

"Now this is our boast: Our conscience testifies that we have conducted ourselves in the world, and especially in our relations with you, in the holiness and sincerity that are from God. We have done so not according to worldly wisdom but according to God's grace."
- Corinthians 1: 12

2010-01-25T05:59:00.003+08:00

God in my laughing
There in my weeping
God in my hurting
God in my healing

Be my everything

Jesus, you're all this heart is living for.

2009-06-20T19:33:00.001+08:00

Jesus taught, "…I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you" (Matthew 17:20).

The power of prayer is not the result of the person praying. Rather, the power resides in the God who is being prayed to. 1 John 5:14-15 tells us, "This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us - whatever we ask - we know that we have what we asked of him." No matter the person praying, the passion behind the prayer, or the purpose of the prayer - God answers prayers that are in agreement with His will. His answers are not always yes, but are always in our best interest.

(taken from fb)

2009-06-20T19:08:00.002+08:00

You give and take away
You give and take away
But my heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be Your name

2009-06-20T02:53:00.001+08:00

you make everything glorious

2009-06-14T17:48:00.001+08:00

This is where you draw the line
This is where the old you ends
Gets left behind
Welcome to forever
This is where you disappear
And you come alive

So this is life
Life is in the letting go
Life is in the sacrifice
Life is when you lose control
It's when you die

2009-06-11T20:32:00.001+08:00

When you and I embrace surrender
When you and I choose to believe
Then you and I will see who we were meant to be

2009-06-11T02:43:00.000+08:00

"And David turned away from Eliab..." (1 Samuel 17:30, AMP)

When David was a shepherd boy, his father asked him to take lunch to his brothers out on the battlefield. When he arrived, he heard Goliath taunting and challenging the people of God. David asked the men standing around, “What is the prize for defeating this giant?” They said, “The reward is one of the king’s daughters in marriage and no more taxes.” That got David’s attention. He knew this was a battle worth fighting.

When David’s older brother, Eliab, heard him talking about fighting the giant, he tried to embarrass him. In front of all those men Eliab said, “David, what are you doing out here? And what have you done with those few sheep our father left you with?” He tried to make him feel small. He was saying, “David, you’re not important. You’ll never do anything great.” But I love the way David responded. The Scripture says that David turned and walked away from Eliab.

I believe one of the main reasons that David was a champion is because he knew which battles to fight. He knew to turn away from discouraging voices so he could focus his energy on the real battle. Today, what are the discouraging voices coming against you? Choose to turn away from those distractions so you can turn toward the victory God has in store for you!

A PRAYER FOR TODAY
Father God, I humbly come to You today releasing all my cares and concerns and focusing on the plan You have for me. Help me to turn away from the discouraging voices so that I can walk in the victory You have for me. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

2009-06-06T20:13:00.002+08:00

Scattered words and empty thoughts
Seem to pour from my heart
I've never felt so torn before
Seems I don't know where to start
But its now that I feel your grace fall like rain
From every fingertip washing away my pain

I still believe in your faithfulness
I still believe in your truth
I still believe in your holy word
Even when I don't see, I still believe

Though the questions still fog up my mind
With promises I still seem to bear
Even when answers slowly unwind
It's my heart I see you prepare
But its now, that I feel, your grace fall like rain
From every fingertip washing away my pain

2009-05-07T18:40:00.002+08:00

I hear the spirit speak whispering my name
Gentle as a butterfly
In a violent hurricane

I feel the spirits breath free me from the net
Flying from captivity
And the life I called a wreck
I hear the spirit speak a voice behind my eyes
It's time for a brand new song to sing
Now I'm saying my goodbyes

I'm an eagle rider flying on your wings
And you take me higher to your beauty I will cling
I'm an eagle rider when I fly above the winds
And I'm climbing higher, so much higher than I've been

I see the world below spinning in the breeze
The giants seem much smaller here
Now I'm living in my dreams
I love the spirits voice it's teaching me to fly
It's time for a rediscovery
As I fall into the sky

I'm Going up, not coming down, I'm Going up, not coming down.
I feel much lighter here, much brighter here,
when I'm with You.
I feel much lighter here, much brighter here.
Hello, hello, goodbye.

Written by Delirious? ©2008 Curious? Music UK

2009-04-27T04:49:00.001+08:00

the same power that conquered the grave lives in me, lives in me.
Your love that rescued the earth lives in me, lives in me. ~~

2009-04-10T20:57:00.003+08:00

"let not the wise man boast of his wisdom
or the strong man boast of his strength
or the rich man boast of his riches,
but let him who boasts boast about this:
that he understands and knows me,
that I am the LORD,
who exercises kindness,
justice and righteousness on earth,
for in these I delight,"
declares the LORD.

- Jeremiah 9: 23-24

2009-04-07T19:39:00.001+08:00

There's a wave that's crashing over me
And all I can do is surrender
Whatever You're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos but somehow there's peace
It's hard to surrender to what I can't see
but I'm giving in to something Heavenly

You're up to something bigger than me
Larger than life something Heavenly

2009-03-17T05:30:00.002+08:00

i got another summer vacation scheme- with herbert smith. 3 internships this summer! >.<

2009-03-16T23:45:00.002+08:00

who are we that You would be mindful of us?
what do You see that's worth looking our way?
we are free in ways that we never should be,
sweet release from the grip of these chains.
like hinges straining from the weight,
my heart no longer can keep from singing.

all that is within me cries for You alone be glorified,
Emmanuel God with us.
my heart sings a brand new song,
the debt is paid these chains are gone,
Emmanuel God with us.

Lord You know our hearts don't deserve Your glory,
still You show a love we cannot afford.
like hinges straining from the weight,
my heart no longer can keep from singing.

Such a tiny offering compared to Calvary
nevertheless we lay it at your feet.

My Soul Sings~

2009-03-13T05:32:00.001+08:00

2009-03-10T08:06:00.000+08:00

Your grace is enough
Heaven reaching down to us
Your grace is enough for me
God I see your grace is enough
I'm covered in your love
Your grace is enough for me
For me

2009-03-02T04:34:00.001+08:00

I see Your face in every sunrise
The colors of the morning are inside Your eyes
The world awakens in the light of the day
I look up to the sky and say You’re beautiful

I see Your power in the moonlit night
Where planets are in motion and galaxies are bright
We are amazed in the light of the stars
It’s all proclaiming who You are
You’re beautiful, You're beautiful

I see you there hanging on a tree
You bled and then you died and then you rose again for me
Now you are sitting on Your heavenly throne
Soon we will be coming home
You’re beautiful, you're beautiful

When we arrive at eternity’s shore
Where death is just a memory and tears are no more
We’ll enter in as the wedding bells ring
Your bride will come together and we’ll sing
You’re beautiful, You're beautiful, You're beautiful

I see Your face, You're beautiful, You're beautiful, You're beautiful
I see Your face, You're beautiful, You're beautiful, You're beautiful
I see Your face, I see Your face
I see Your face, You’re beautiful, You’re beautiful, You’re beautiful

2009-02-19T02:37:00.000+08:00

above all

i live for your glory

2009-02-09T06:26:00.007+08:00

i just finished watching friday night lights season 3!! hehe i still love matt saracen!! esp the scenes with his grandma! aww.

the journey of a quarterback who never left the bench....

to QB1 and state champs! :)

(haha ok all that happened in season 1 actually. lol.)

2009-02-06T07:10:00.000+08:00

i feel like playing bball :(

2009-01-31T01:31:00.001+08:00

whatttt. no way..! hmphhh.

tour dates (delirious?)
March 2009

12-15 G12 Asia: The Max Pavilion, Singapore Expo - Singapore
16 Queen Elizabeth Stadium - Wanchai, Hong Kong
17 Araneta Coliseum - Manila, Philippines
19-21 Joyce Meyer - Long Beach Arena, Long Beach - California, USA

2009-01-30T01:03:00.003+08:00

GOD IS AMAAAAZING! I just got a summer vacation scheme with Clifford Chance, the biggest and best law firm in the world (it so is, it was my first choice!:) ) and I can assure you that I could NOT have done it alone!! the whole experience itself was already amazing because I actually didnt feel very nervous or stressed throughout the assessment day. (tho i was v tired after that) and knowing me, i usually get easily anxious and stressed abt everything. I got increasingly relaxed and chilled as the day drew closer coz i managed to leave it all in God's hands bit by bit.

But for that assessment day and after i just really asked God for strength and faith and perfect peace that is beyond all human knowledge and understanding! coz i so needed all of those! in fact there was one point when i got depressed because i just felt that i couldnt do this- i am not gd enough, suck at interviews, am not commercially aware... etc

But God gave me strength and faith and I worked hard at preparations. Even after the assessment day, the more I thought about everything the more I thought things didnt go too well and I shouldve said this, shouldve said that. etc... and I struggled to leave everything in His most perfect hands because i really wanted the vac scheme because of something- which brings me to the next amazing thing- something to do with timing!

A barrister chamber offered me a unassessed mini pupilage (that I didnt apply for-- long story.) and we had trouble agreeing on a date coz they said they couldnt agree to have me do it in the summer coz thats when the real pupils come in. and there seemed to be absolutely no way this was gonna work out, and then they offered the end of july. and it is such a neither-here-nor-there time coz my summer hols is prob from like mid may to end september. but i absolutely didnt know why i blurted out "ok, that shouldnt be a problem."! and then that was that, it was confirmed and she was gonna send a confirmation letter. :/ then the next day it just suddenly dawned upon me that it was such a weird time. and why did i agree to it?!

and I got so stressed about it. coz what if i didnt get any vac schemes in end june-early july??? and that was highly possible considering i didnt apply to many firms. then when do i go home in the summer? what will i do from may til end july in london with most pple back home alr?! or if i go home first, what will i do the whole of aug and sep!? and like, i alr confirmed the pupilage and stuff- the chamber was gonna write me a confirmation letter. and if i dont do july there'd be no other time. and i didnt even apply for it so i felt bad to cause so much trouble. and the list goes on. i couldnt stop worrying and thinking. but then i really learnt to leave everything entirely safe into God's most perfect and powerful hands once again. and I just trusted that He could and would sort things out and make everything ok somehow, like He always does, even though everything seemed so impossible to sort out.

and then there was this other problem. i applied to another law firm's vac scheme and i regretted it, coz their assessment day is the craziest thing ever. but i only found out after i got called for the telephone interview. and i was seriously thinking of withdrawing. but then it may be a good experience. and withdrawing may just leave a bad image. and withdrawing is like quitting. but i didnt know if it was worth ALL the trouble. and i havent been hearing many good things abt the firm lately. oh WELL. WHAT to do? leave everything in God's hands once again.

my tele interview was on the day after CC's assessment day, and i felt that it went really well. much too well for comfort to be honest. it was much easier than CC's one and i was very relaxed. so whats gonna happen then?

then today the most amazing thing happened. during the assessment day CC told us that most of us, abt 85-90% will hear back from them in one week. and today is thursday. and the assessment day was on tuesday. and i got a call. so i was thinking oh dear. so fast, must be rejection shoot. they so fast decided dun want me alr!? siannn. but no! i got it!!! (and i have to notify them acceptance/rejection of offer in 7 days.)

and then they gave me a choice of when i wanted to do the placement and so now im being offered a placement from 22 june to 17july! so it ends just 1 wk before the blackstone pupilage starts on 27th july! :o and then, literally like as soon as I put down the phone with CC, i received an email from the other firm (which i had a tele interview with and which had the craziest assessment day) and the email read that I'm not being invited for an assessment day.

wow. wowwwwww. Is God amazing or what!???!?! :D

The greatest day in history, Death is beaten
You have rescued me
Sing it out Jesus is alive
The empty cross, The empty grave
Life eternal You have won the day
Shout it out Jesus is alive
He's alive

Oh happy day, happy day
You washed my sin away
Oh happy day, happy day
I'll never be the same
Forever I am changed

When I stand, in that place
Free at last, meeting face to face
I am Yours Jesus You are mine
Endless joy, perfect peace
Earthly pain finally will cease
Celebrate Jesus is alive
He's alive

Oh what a glorious day
What a glorious way
That You have saved me
Oh what a glorious day
What a glorious name

2009-01-26T06:09:00.001+08:00

They tell you where you need to go
They tell you when you'll need to leave
They tell you what you need to know
They tell you who you need to be

But everything inside you knows
There's more than what you've heard
There's so much more than empty conversations
Filled with empty words

And you're on fire
When He's near you
You're on fire
When He speaks
You're on fire
Burning at these mysteries

Give me one more time around
Give me one more chance to see
Give me everything You are
Give me one more chance to be (near You)

Cause everything inside me looks like
Everything I hate
You are the hope I have for change
You are the only chance I'll take

When I'm on fire
When You're near me
I'm on fire
When You speak
And I'm on fire
Burning at these mysteries
These mysteries...

I'm standing on the edge of me
I'm standing on the edge of me
I'm standing on the edge of me

I'm standing on the edge of everything
I've never been before.
And I've been standing on the edge of me
Standing on the edge

And I'm on fire
When You're near me
I'm on fire
When You speak
I'm on fire
Burning at these mysteries... these mysteries... these mysteries
You're the mystery
You're the mystery

(written by Switchfoot)

2009-01-20T06:43:00.002+08:00

omg i just found a firm in London that pays 90, 000 pounds a yr to NEWLY qualified lawyers, i.e just finished training contract, and its a small firm and one trainee said this, "this kind of experience is not for the faint-hearted...." hahahaha. imagine the working hours. but the firm provides..... "birthday holidays" >.<

haha anyway! i am not gonna apply there and I have an interview+ assessment day coming up! and one telephone interview! wish me all the best! hehe :)

2009-01-15T00:27:00.001+08:00

Lost for words with all to say
Lord you take my breath away
Still my soul, my soul cries out
You are holy

And as I look upon Your name
Circumstances fade away
Now Your glory steals my heart
You are holy
You are holy
You are holy Lord

Evermore my heart, my heart will say
Above all, I live for Your glory
Even if my world falls I will say
Above all, I live for Your glory

With all my heart I'll say
I'm living for Your name
With all to give You praise
We're living for Your glory Lord

Evermore my heart, my heart will say
Above all, I live for Your glory
Even if my world falls I will say
Above all, I live for Your glory

2009-01-07T23:03:00.002+08:00

"This is how we know we are in him: whoever claims to live in him must walk as Jesus did." - 1 John 2:5-6

"Do not love the world or anything in the world." -1 John 2:15

Lost is where You found me
Shattered and frail
But You love me still
Trouble may surround me
My heart may fail
But You never will
You never will

2008-12-23T17:45:00.001+08:00

no more virgin hair! :o

ok la, no more virgin fringe. i dont even have a fringe. but well that area- u know what i mean. lol.

2008-12-22T15:27:00.001+08:00

i hate jetlag to the core. it not only freakin' wastes my time, it makes me incredibly annoyed.

2008-12-18T02:30:00.008+08:00

it's almost 3am and im baaaaack! :))) the movies and music on the plane were so bad:( hmpf. i was so bored and i couldn sleep. oh well. fafs came and picked me up:) i was so tired i was telling myself in the car that i'd play with rocky and buddy after i shower and sleep but when the gate opened and i saw rocky and buddy coming to greet me in the garden, omg i just screamed. hahaha. theyre irresistable lol. :p

----------------------------------------------------------

(thats me in yellow!! :p )

woohoo some highlights of monday night's delirious? christmas gig!

when samuel (he desperately went to the usual same restaurant as them for dinner!) texted leanne saying "theyre heading ur way now", and then martin smith walked discretely past the long queue, face partially hidden by the collar of his trench coat.. hidden between 2 big sized pple (he actually looks very small-sized in real life- or isit coz of the 2 pple beside him? but anyway..) and his eye suddenly caught my eye and so i waved. haha, instinctively. and he gave a thumbsup, and some other pple in the queue also realised coz i heard some low "ehhh..!" being shouted. hahaha.

when there were "dont break up" shouts once again when martin talked abt how amazing it is seeing so many pple.... and then this time he sorta explained about the decision. (btw while queueing we met the guy who first shouted that at the indigo gig! haha)

when martin asked how the pple up at the back were and the cheers from 3rd level were extraordinary and didnt quite stop soon. and martin said its probably their last xmas gig at SBE :(( no wonder there was this professional photographer filming the thing. sighhh.

when i caught a santa hat:)) hehe i think it's tim's. it's either tim's or jon's anyway. coz it was the one of the crew that threw it and i know its not martin's or stuG's or paul's. ohh and stew was at the gig! lol.

when delirious? was gonna start love will find a way (3rd song) and someone shouted happy song! paul stopped clicking the sticks and martin just shrugged. lol. WHY cant they just do it! i mean, it's their last xmas gig! hmphhh.

and the whole gig was just awesome. i tried not to use my camera too much and just enjoyed it. the starting was amaaazing:))) and the christmas song (merry xmas everyone by shakin stevens)! :DD and the kids on stage singing rudolph the red nose reindeer! lol.

Snow is falling
all around me
children playing
having fun
it's the season
love and understanding
merry christmas everyone

time for parties and celebration
people dancing all night long
time for presents
and exchanging kisses
time for singing christmas songs

we're gonna have a party tonight
i'm gonna find that girl underneath the misteltoe,
we'll kissed by candlelight
Room is swaying, records playing
All the songs, we love to hear
All I wish that everyday was christmas
What a nice way to spend the year~

2008-12-11T23:06:00.004+08:00

i've yet to watch the dvd but i'm really liking the compassionart cd!!! excellent music, for an excellent cause- what are you waiting for, get your copy now!! all proceeds go to charity.

http://www.purashop.com/christian-music/various-compassionart-cddvd.p27227.html

i just cant find the lyrics of the songs anywhere! not even in the bklet that comes with the album. hmpf.

2008-12-10T04:13:00.001+08:00

Lord you take my breath away

2008-12-06T22:44:00.001+08:00

And who I am will take the second chance you gave me.

2008-12-03T04:05:00.000+08:00

'Kingdom Of Comfort' Wins 'Best Christian Contemporary Album'
Added: 25 Nov 2008

'Kingdom Of Comfort', released by Delirious? in April, won the 'Best Christian Contemporary Album' award at the UK's Christian Broadcasting Council music awards on 21st November. The awards, organised in conjunction with Cross Rhythms, were announced at the annual CBC Conference that took place in Manchester's Salford Quays.

The CBC awards are a long established celebration recognising the best in the UK Christian music industry. The annual conference is a Trade Show for Christian Publishers and Suppliers from across the UK and Europe.

Delirious? have a long and successful history at the CBC music awards, having won the Christian Contemporary Album award for previous albums World Service (2004), Audio Lessonover? (2002) and Glo (2001). Last years winners were thebandwithnoname for their 'Dying To Be There' album.

2008-12-01T07:13:00.003+08:00

i hate how im starting each week dreading the week and just looking forward to the weekend. and the wkend passes so quickly. and the cycle continues! ahyooo! siannnn!!! but this coming wkend ill be gg shopping!! :D im so excited hehe. i dunno how i can like make it through without medic in my hall la. and thankkkkssss for helping to satisfy my past 2 cravings hehe:D

2008-11-29T03:43:00.002+08:00

God is amazing, God is amazing, God is amazing!! :D

2008-11-27T07:13:00.003+08:00

applicationssssssssssss!! siannnnn. but i somehow still feel happy... listening to this song. hehe :)) and i happen to think the guy on the ae.com front page now. is so attractive. hahaha. :)

The greatest day in history,
Death is beaten, You have rescued me
Sing it out Jesus is alive

The empty cross,
The empty grave
Life eternal, You have won the day
Shout it out Jesus is alive

He's alive!

Oh happy day, happy day!
You washed my sin away
Oh happy day, happy day!
I'll never be the same
Forever I am changed

When I stand, in that place
Free at last, meeting face to face
I am Yours Jesus You are mine
Endless joy, perfect peace
Earthly pain finally will cease
Celebrate Jesus is alive

He's alive!

Oh happy day, happy day!
You washed my sin away
Oh happy day, happy day!
I'll never be the same
Forever I am changed

Oh what a glorious day!
What a glorious way
That You have saved me
Oh what a glorious day
What a glorious name!

2008-11-26T02:37:00.003+08:00

oh great. i just spent 5 pounds on smses in less than 2 days. :o
i got the msg "congratulations, u have now qualified for free weekend calls and texts" (spent at least 5pounds) so early this wk. tuesday is not even over. night is not even here. ahhhh.

i usually get the msg "congratulations u have now qualified for free wkend texts, u are now more than half way to qualifying for free wkend calls! spend XXX more this wk by friday......" (spent at least 2.50pounds) on wed or thurs lor. now i got both free wkend calls and texts alr! :xxx

and i am still smsing. derwzzyyyyyyy! haha. :) <3

2008-11-24T07:31:00.003+08:00

my phones are working intermittently. (peishan says i can continue carrying 3 phones around. haha)

there's just so much going on:( i don't know what i want and i don't know what to do.

I watched the proverbial sunrise
coming up over the Pacific and
you might think I'm losing my mind,
but I will shy away from the specifics...

'cause I don't want you to know where I am

This is no place to try and live my life.

Stop right there. That's exactly where I lost it.
See that line. Well I never should have crossed it.

2008-11-23T05:08:00.005+08:00

ok my phones are both not working i dunno why. they stopped working at the same time and im so annoyed and distressed. siannnnnn.

so i just had to watch the latest episode of friday night lights. HAHA mrs taylor is crazy!! rofl. and tyra is still so annoying. matt may become a receiver! coolness! a pity he's not starting quarterback anymore coz he plays with such heart. but oh well. tim riggins is still forever so typically tim its so funny. hehe :p

2008-11-21T08:47:00.004+08:00

ive been going out shopping/ online shopping so much these days!! ahh. not that ive bought loads of stuff but i've been browsing a lot! and today was no different. we went to uniqlo to get free stuff/packs of thermal wear at 10am today. haha! but turned out i got size L for both the top and bottom. SIGH. :((( what a shame. coz i got quite nice colours! purple top, black bottom! hmpffff.

anyvayyyy yay i bought a scarf from River Island again! it seems the pple around me are like all in the shopping mood as well (retail therapy? lol). this coming wednesday i'll be going shopping again. at westfield! the biggest shopping mall in europe:) and oh ya! i went to bershka today!!! ohmy i just loove bershka. :)))

then went for bridge at lse with peishan and on our way back we smelt the smell of swissrolls and so i started craving polar express' swissrolls v badly! i actually so wished i was in singapore there are then omg! :( and then somehow our craving got transformed into a hummingbird cupcake craving (that craving again! :/ ) and we were like going all "arghhh." "sighhh." "hummingbirdddddd" when! we had dinner, went back to our rooms and before i even sat down on my chair, my phone rang and peishan was like "COME TO MY ROOM NOW! MY ROOMIE BOUGHT ME HUMMINGBIRD CUPCAKES!" i was just like, :o :o :o are u serious!?!?

omg indeed!!!!!!! red velvettttttttttttt cupcakeeeeeeeeeee:D:D:D hehe we were so excited. suddenly, we felt so awake. :)

2008-11-14T06:17:00.004+08:00

i suddenly feel like eating ramen :(( sun with moon ramen! argh
----------------------------------------------------------------

(2 derwzys who just couldn't stop laughing)

2008-11-12T23:14:00.003+08:00

i loooove watching Friday Night Lights!! :))) though i just wish tyra would just go away. omgosh. shes just. so. annoying. :o

2008-11-03T22:27:00.000+08:00

Jesus, what can I give
What can I bring
To so faithful a friend
To so loving a king
Saviour, what can be said
What can be sung
As a praise of Your name
For the things You have done

Oh my words could not tell
Not even in part
Of the debt of love that is owed
By this thankful heart

2008-11-02T04:16:00.002+08:00

I feel a stranger in this land.
Where every step the gods command.
I breathe.

I feel danger every day,
With every stone we throw away.
Careful it's falling,
And who will sing a difference song?
I hope to God it won't be long.
Believe.
Show me a way to a higher place.
Why is there sunshine on my guilty face?

And I've never felt so alien.
Yes I've never felt so alien.

2008-10-31T23:20:00.001+08:00

i feel... stressed:( why.... do i have soo much work! :((

anyway im going to canterbury for 2 days during reading wk next wk! :))) hehe

2008-10-29T02:58:00.001+08:00

Well, all I need
Is the air I breathe
And a place to rest
My head

Do you think you can find it?
Do you think you can find it?
Do you think you can find it?
Better than you had it
Do you think you can find it?
Do you think you can find it?
Do you think you can find it?

2008-10-26T05:41:00.003+08:00

haha derwzy asked me abt halloween and this is what followed...

~raehui++// in a moment of eternity. says:
me wanna be a ghost.
*//rae*~ says:
HAHAHA
*//rae*~ says:
?!?!!
*//rae*~ says:
omg
.......................
(rw gives other suggestions)
......................

~raehui++// in a moment of eternity. says:
hahaha
~raehui++// in a moment of eternity. says:
i wanna be....... a ghost.
~raehui++// in a moment of eternity. says:
still.
*//rae*~ says:
rofl
*//rae*~ says:
see me mood
*//rae*~ says:
im gonna be ghost too
*//rae*~ says:
rofl
*//rae*~ says:
casper

*//rae*~ says:
omg
*//rae*~ says:
im gonna be a pig

~raehui++// in a moment of eternity. says:
casper.
~raehui++// in a moment of eternity. says:
HAHAHAHA
~raehui++// in a moment of eternity. says:
me gonna be a pig too!
~raehui++// in a moment of eternity. says:
rofl
*//rae*~ says:
lol
*//rae*~ says:
SET
~raehui++// in a moment of eternity. says:
we can win the most unglam halloween disguise la omg
~raehui++// in a moment of eternity. says:
SET
~raehui++// in a moment of eternity. says:
hahahaha
*//rae*~ says:
HAHAHA
........................

~raehui++// in a moment of eternity. says:
derwzy.
~raehui++// in a moment of eternity. says:
Nothing:(
*//rae*~ says:
we celebrate together haha'
~raehui++// in a moment of eternity. says:
okie!!
~raehui++// in a moment of eternity. says:
eh our xmas parteh shd be halloween themed
~raehui++// in a moment of eternity. says:
rofl
~raehui++// in a moment of eternity. says:
then we can turn our dream parteh into reality
*//rae*~ says:
OMGGGGG
*//rae*~ says:
I AGREEE
OMGGG
LOL
*//rae*~ says:
and we can both be pigs
*//rae*~ says:
Rofl

*//rae*~ says:
actually lets theme it pig
*//rae*~ says:
everyone mus be a pig
*//rae*~ says:
lol

2008-10-24T04:58:00.001+08:00

i should really stop buying hoodies. oh man. :/

2008-10-24T04:35:00.001+08:00

ok! highlights from sat night's gig!:)

martin leading the crowd with a few lines of the happy song chorus before saying, 'ok thats enough'. hahaha OMG i really thought they were gonna do it!!!! :o rofl.

martin saying how wonderful it is to be here and see so many pple etc, and someone shouts, "well, dont break up then!" (which was met by a roar from the crowd) to which he seems to not know what to say before saying, "we still have... *checks watch* another 1 hour 15 min to go.. dont worry." haha.

martin running during pttr and dropping his mic without knowing it, until he wanted to sing and realised his hand was as if it was holding a mic but it just wasnt there!

martin singing this random hilarious song he created on the spot to rosie (?) (cousin?) who was present.

crowd started shouting for the encore before delirious even finished going off stage, "one more song! one more song! TEN more songs!" hahaha :))

when they played deeper:)))

during the second verse of pttr when ms came over:)

2008-10-23T05:23:00.000+08:00

Before the day
Before the light
Before the world revolved around the sun
God on high
Stepped down into time
And wrote the story of His love for everyone

He has filled our hearts with wonder
So that we always remember

You and I were made to worship
You and I are called to love
You and I are forgiven and free
You and I embrace surrender
You and I choose to believe
You and I will see who we were meant to be

All we are
And all we have
Is all a gift from God that we receive
Brought to life
We open up our eyes
To see the majesty and glory of the King

He has filled our hearts with wonder
So that we always remember

You and I were made to worship
You and I are called to love
You and I are forgiven and free
You and I embrace surrender
You and I choose to believe
You and I will see who we were meant to be

And even the rocks cry out
And even the Heavens shout
At the sound of His holy name
So let every voice sing out
And let every knee bow down
He is worthy of all our praise

2008-10-19T08:09:00.003+08:00

i just came back from the delirious gig at the indigo. went shopping at oxford street with leanne before that. next wk is my crazyyyy week. and ive the wkend gone! :o

queued, was right in front, almost exactly middle, tube was down, the only line that goes to the o2 was down (!!!!), met some forum pple, hung out after the gig for a while, GOT NEW D: MERCH (:D im rewarding myself a bit with the extra money i suddenly have. hehe), gig was great, AM SO TIRED, got evan's drumstick, took 2GB worth of videos and pics, .. have british accents all saturating my head. and did i mention, I AM SO TIRED. hahaha tmrw on lights at church. bring it on. whew.

gd night.

2008-10-17T21:27:00.003+08:00

i feel so utterly disgusted studying the article by brooks-gordon, on not criminalising prostitution. the reasonings are so trivial and perverse and totally lacks objectivity. >:( grrr.

~~i actually feel like vomitting.~~

2008-10-05T18:23:00.001+08:00

http://www.purashop.com/christian-music/various-compassionart-cd.p27227.html

get ur copy now! :)

2008-10-04T03:08:00.001+08:00

i have been sucking lozenges and drinking water and so going to the toilet all day. :(

but im going shopping with chloe tmrw!!! :D:D and gg to chinatown to eat! and nab me yam bubblemilk!!! the one. woohoo :D

2008-10-02T17:47:00.004+08:00

hehe same shirt! :D (we posed for this picture/print screen btw hahaha)

ahyo. dunno how blogger made the pic so blur and pathetic but it is originally not so pathetic-looking lor. hmpf.

2008-09-29T16:52:00.001+08:00

ok my left cheek still hurts because someone disgustingly elbowed me right in the face so incredibly desperately at bball last saturday. >:( grr.

2008-09-29T16:18:00.002+08:00

yay i did lights at church yday, the first time in a loooong while! ohh i missed it:) yday they played some greattt songs. the band in church did a wonderful cover of Awesome Is The Lord Most High by Chris Tomlin! i thought it sounded much better than the Chris Tomlin version i have, which is a live version. i loved the guitar riffs they did at church- spiced it up loads! so doing the lights yday was fun:) the series of talks on our church's vision is also going well, and as usual, i went back, in a very good mood. :D and starving. as it was nearly 8. luckily i asked peishan and michelle to eat first and didnt agree to any dinner plans... you just never know how long it'll take to clear up everything and get home..! but i like what i do. :p

2008-09-27T18:55:00.001+08:00

this is an amazing read..

The Future of Modern Worship
Martin Smith

I have just had another one of those strange feelings. Another telephone interview has just occurred with an excitable American lady calling from Virginia Beach in Virginia. She asks me where I'm from and with just a little too much mischief for my spiritual reputation I reply "Littlehampton beach, Littlehampton". She exclaims "is that in England?" and I reply with even more mischief that "it is the capital of England and the centre for world revival". As is usual she hasn't heard the new record (bless her) but thinks it's "awesome anyhow" and believes with a passion that Delirious? hold the keys to the future of modern worship.

When I secretly contemplate to myself, there are two things I am sure of. Firstly, that God is worthy to be praised and has always been from the dawn of time to eternity. And secondly, Delirious? is doing nothing new but just hanging on the coat tails of the Kendrick's, Wesley's and further back, Handel himself. Whenever I hear that phrase spoken over us, however kind it is meant, it literally puts the fear of God in me, and remember, we're not talking about any old god here, like the god of rock 'n roll - we're talking about God with a capital G "GOD". Not even the G in Stu G's name comes close believe it or not!

I must digress at this point. When people thought that Eric Clapton was God - probably what they really meant was that they felt the presence of the big "G" when he played. And this here I have come to understand as the greatest mystery and paradox - that God uses people like us, full of contradiction, private sins, little self-belief and a bit scraggy around the edges (Darlene Zschech exempt of course!) and yet gives us the keys to the "Glory box". The grace for playing music that pleases God, grace that makes God our biggest fan (you know the sweaty one who is always squashed against the crash barrier) cheering us on shouting "come on, come on, I'm worthy to be praised and desperate to change lives, sing with all you have and walk reverently before your God". This is not a job for the elite, this really is "power to the people" and it's the people, you and me, who must humble ourselves and let God play on our heartstrings and allow us to build small windows so that from time to time we can all peer through and glimpse the beauty of our creator.

So, to the future of modern worship. I immediately digress again. People for centuries have worn clothes but the style and cut has changed and always will change. You get my point don't you, that we will and always have worshiped God but the way in which we do so has and always will change because God is a God of change and loves creativity. Of course the challenge in writing a piece like this is that you are forced into talking about the wrapping around the sweet knowing how important it is, but never, never, ever being more important than the sweet itself. So with that in mind, I will for a moment indulge on some thoughts for the future and how important packaging is in this consumerist society (and yes, that includes every one of us). All of us care about packaging whether we admit to it or not and must understand that God cares about how we present ourselves and our art too. We know that when Solomon built the temple, how eloquently he listed details of decoration ranging from golden emblems to pomegranate carvings. Of course God's priority was the temple but we see him taking great delight in decorating it! Yes, God plays on our heartstrings, but let's be diligent and tune our guitars up properly.

Yes, God delights in the song of the Lord, but it's not going to bless the people as much if you've got a case of the "wobblies". Let's have common sense too - none of us would call a plumber out to fix our cars, so encourage people to do what they're good at. So again to the future of modern worship! I have to say that what excites me most is "freedom". Freedom is being free and being free is freedom. That's what I see, it's the truth that sets us free and we must continually sing of the truth that Jesus really is the saviour of the world. Even though as church we have lost our grip on many things (i.e. the media and communications) let's never forget that everything we love and believe about Jesus is true. So let's jolly well stop singing about how it "feels" to know his love or "your arms keep me warm". Let's shout it from the rooftops that it's all TRUE, and that this truth about the greatest man who walked the planet is still alive today. God the father IS to be feared, and it's His mercy that triumphs over judgement. The main disease we have inside and outside the church is "not sure-itus".

All of us are so influenced by the pick 'n mix religion culture that exists today that sometimes we don't even know who we're singing about on "our God reigns" and whether we believe it anyway. Let's get some facts back into the music and as the planet resounds with "Jesus is Lord" let us all be changed by the truth that holds the keys to awakening in this nation.

So, more about freedom. Oh no, I am about to completely contradict myself. I'm always doing this but let's be honest, rock n' roll is about being yourself, giving red and yellow expression to a black and white world. Whether we play the violin at HTB, the organ at All Souls, the acoustic at Spring Harvest (ovation guitars excluded of course) or drum pads triggering huge sampled sounds, we are all in God's great rock n' roll band. And why, you ask, because rock n' roll is about breaking the rules and with God's help we can, and must, continue to believe that God can do anything with music. Believe that God can sing when we play, know that music has the secret keys to someone's soul and that one note can bring tears, joy, excitement, rekindling of dreams, the need to forgive, the realisation that we are nothing without God. And how do we know these things are true? Because God loves music and music ushers in the presence of Jesus, and yes, Jesus is freedom personified.

So, back to the world called future. We are not going to believe the packaging that God is going to put around music because it is and has always been his secret weapon in softening the hardest of hearts as droves of our population run to a life of salvation. I see churches in night clubs (happening already) worshipping God to a huge garage mix. I see scruffy kids playing thrash metal in their garage worshipping their King and I see the OAP whistling to the latest Keswick hymns tape whilst doing up his old Bentley in his garage.

Freedom, freedom, freedom. It has no colour and yet all the colours. You can write two sorts of song as a Christian. Songs about the light and songs written about what you see 'by the light'. If you're good at writing songs for the congregation then keep doing it. And if you prefer to comment on life and society then do that. What we all need is a redemption of frameworks. In Ezekiel 44 v19 it says that the priests who ministered in the temple put on every day clothes when they left to go into the outer courts (i.e. the market place) meaning that they changed their appearance to fit in with the people. We must realise that there are two worlds, and we have to learn to communicate appropriately to the two worlds. This is why music is so powerful because it doesn't need words that so often confuse the brain. God raise up people to write about what they see, whether it's "great is the Lord" or "did you covenant, or live a dream in your head". The future is doing both. Let's stop being confused by the two worlds but delight in the different packaging that unlocks the message inside.

This is the future where "two hearts beat as one" where worship isn't just a jolly sing-along, but church becomes an expression of all the God colours and a creative hotbed for all the painters, sculptors, photographers, ballet dancers, opera singers, stand-up comics, film directors, clothing stylists, sound engineers, actors, novelists and loads more. Children discovering techno instead of t.v. and pop stars discovering purity instead of pain. Let the future be full of people "going into the ministry", the thing that they are created to do, and in doing so - fulfilling God's purposes for our lives.

Please God fill the air with your music. Top of the Pops, Radio 1, the Proms, the Opera House, the Country Music Fayres, the Dance Tent at the Glastonbury Music Festival - all filled with God's sound. The secret sound who's root is in the holy place, and yet is meant to be the trumpet call to the lost soul.

I despise the notion that worship has become a style of music that can be harnessed in "Nashvegas" and packaged for all the world. I despise the pursuit of monetary gain and decisions to just "do" worship because that's what's selling.

For us as a band we have and continue to work through issues like this, such as always wanting to "let out what is within" and make the records we want to but having the worry that if we don't sell any records then our staff don't get paid. I'm sure that we don't always hold the balance perfectly and there is grace when the balance shifts one way or the other. The main thing to reinforce is that there is one qualification to being in God's great rock n' roll band - that we are God pleasers before we are man pleasers.

Because music is so subjective to many different sorts of people, we have had to treat everything lightly - some thought that "Mezzamorphis" was the leaving of Delirious? into a world full of coke and women, and some think that "Glo" is the softening of our mainstream vision returning to kids drinking coke and flattery from middle aged women!

For us we want and feel compelled to do both. On the one hand because we want, and have to influence culture, but on the other hand Jesus is coming back for His bride and not Radio 1 believe it or not.

So, if you keep it simple or keep it loud, be free in the glorious love of God and let's run into the future like wide-eyed children.

Martin Smith, 23/09/2008

2008-09-26T21:59:00.001+08:00

i have this thing for scarfs now. ahhh

2008-09-25T23:50:00.004+08:00

ok yday me and faith went to watch onerepublic. we both listened to their entire newest album on the plane and are in love with 2 of their biggest hit songs. so u see, we are not really fans of them. but anyway! tix weren't expensive and so we went... we got really good seats upstairs, first row, middle :p and their first supporting act was a band called "a silent film".

ok rather unknown, and they came onstage very.. casually... then i thought the singer's singing kinda sucked.. but then. omg. i actually liked them. their music is very typically british rock, very instrumental, innovative, experimental............ ahh i like!! and their fashion sense.......!! performance was not bad! (b4 the gig a lady was giving out stickers to us so we can go online and dl a silent film's latest single for free. and so i decided to dl their single afterall!)

then so that performance woke me up (me and faith were falling asleep as it was ... er... 8 o'clock. hahaha.) and then u know usually there's only 1 support act for a gig. so we were like, "ok onerepublic shd be coming up with a grand entrance coz theyre the main act.. blah blah" and suddenly 3 guys walked up casually and there was a roar. ok! one republic! so i was thinking aloud, "eh! one republic got 3 guys ah? i thought they had 5.. ohhhh so actually they only have 3..!" faith was like, "oh ya hor... ohhhh.. ok.."

and the 3 guys played a slow song to start the set. -.- and after that another slow song.. and another... then we're like.. !?!?!? what?? what are they doing? wrong choice of songs! then they played a hit. but by someone else. and faith was like, this song is by aqualung, i love it. and im like, WHAT are they doing playing a cover song at their own gig!? and then faith was like, nono but its a really good song.. so ok. then. they played the 3rd slow song and faith was like, "ohhhh i heard this song in the plane! i recognise it!" so ok we were like taking pics and i was videoing a bit...

and then the singer spoke. then im like, "WHY does he sound brit. onerepublic is. american. there is something wrong." then the singer said ".... we havent been touring for a year so..." :o. they are not one republic. HAHAHA we were like :o :o omg we really thought they were one republic all along! then we were like oh ok theyre some rubbished unknown band who plays just cover songs... coz their perf wasnt exactly good or entertaining and we were bored and wanted them to just leave. haha.

and then we saw some pple in the front being quite enthu and like jumping and waving and faith was like, "HAHA maybe they also think theyre one republic!" then we laugh laugh..... and then. they played another hit song by. aqualung. and faith was like. "omg. is this aqualung!? " and then we realised. it was. aqualung. HAHAHA. we were so retarded! lol. anyway one republic. they were.. not bad. but not definitely not spectacular. i actually got quite sian tow the end of the gig.. i hate the lead singer's beggar-looking tshirt.. i shall describe it to u jus so u can imagine.

its dark green.
v neck.
very loose.
3/4 sleeved.

and was all soaked in his sweat.

gross. dark green and V NECK and VERY LOOSE and THREE QUARTER SLEEVED. JUST DONTTT GOOO. AT ALL. omg. lead singers should be dressed more decently, really. or more creatively. (in a nice way)

and i loved the stage lights! ive never really been so far back in a concert/gig so this time i could actually appreciate the entire look of the stage, with full view of the lighting effects etc. quite amazing! i was also looking at the lightings guy and he looked like he was playing the piano! lol so cool. :) anyway ill post some pics up to fb sometime..heh. (posted! http://www.new.facebook.com/album.php?aid=76283&l=b2248&id=639002068)

oh ya! i used the gym at mic yday! i like how it has speakers for me to plug my ipod into! :D and how it has an aircon-cum-heater! i made the temp 27degrees and i ran, feeling like i was running in warm sunny singapore!! :D yay! (only thing not humid :/ )

2008-09-22T02:48:00.000+08:00

~with arms high and heart abandoned~

all i am is yours.

2008-09-19T14:08:00.004+08:00

yayyy mic kinda rocks! :D i've finished unpacking everything! every one of my humongous luggages! :D woohoo! and now the empty luggages are in the store room as they take up far to much space! >.< anyway! i love how there are like random shelves and hooks and stuff to put/hang all my many things! i've this really tall, 5-layered book shelf in my room! (so useful!! :D) and then in the toilet there's this random 3 or 4 layered shelf too! and my cupboard is so full :x and there's this wooden rack to hang my clothes :) and i have 2 chairs! one is wheely and the other is a normal cushioned one! i love my room man! my table is looonng and sufficient, there was a table lamp provided (but actually i still continue to use my own), and my bed is nice and firm! and mic provided duvet and pillows that are decent enough! oh and bedsheets are also provided! hmm i seem to possess quite a bit of unnecessary stuff now!

and the best thing is! i love the way mic feeds us! full breakfast buffet! and dinner has everything too (main, side, soup+bread, drinks, hot/cold desserts) , and the food is not bad! breakfast is the best omg. full english breakfast (bacon, all sorts of eggs, tomatoes, mushrooms, sausages, toast..), waffles, pancakes, cut fruits, yoghurts, dried fruits, muesli, a spread of cereals, all kinds of hot and cold drinks.... ah.

and internet access was immediate and free! and they even provided me with a bible! and the staff are all so nice! woohoooooooooooooooo :)

oh did i mention? i did pray for all these small things =p (small things matter, and they add up babeh:) )

oh, and i had 4 whole seats (one entire row) to myself on my flight back =]

2008-09-14T21:15:00.001+08:00

ahyo. the new facebook is so incredibly... ideal for stalking! :o
lol.

2008-09-14T16:06:00.003+08:00

The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group and said to Jesus, "Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. The Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?" They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him.

But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, "If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her." Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground.

At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. Jesus straightened up and asked her, "Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?"

"No one, sir," she said.

"Then neither do I condemn you," Jesus declared. "Go now and leave your life of sin."

-John 8: 3-11

2008-09-12T22:25:00.003+08:00

today was my last day at wong p! :D from what i hear from all the other interns... i can more or less conclude that i had the best/friendliest/most helpful mentor! yay. hehe. im quite grateful:)

anyway me just ate crabbbbbbbbbbs! :D hehe me, pipz, ah du and fafs ate 6 crabs! chilli, pepper, steamed! with nans, at tanglin club!:D and i ordered both mango sticky rice and ice kachang later on as i really wanted to eat both! :) now, just bring on the seafood pasta and escargots!

and then just now when i came back, i was sayang-ing rocky and buddy, and then rocky kept like burying his head under my leg/ snuggling with my leg and so i was guessing he was about to fall asleep.... so i was like petting him and then i started reaching for buddy, but just then, i heard. a rather loud snore. which became. a continuous snore. omg. i looked at rocky....... and he was sound asleep. with his head snuggled comfortably with my leg. omg. sooooooooo superrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr cuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuute!!!!!!!!! :D

2008-09-10T19:22:00.012+08:00

heh ive been learning how to do hair 'tricks' at my internship! :) first it was french braid (centre, side, wherever! haha) and then laura was describing how to do this other style during coffee break one morning and so i decided to try it out today... so i anyhow tried it and it felt so loose and messy and failure-ish and i was gonna like show li ling how disasterish my attempt has become when suddenly i heard li ling gasp and go, "how the hell do you do that!?" so i was like, huh, who, me?? and then she took this pic to show me and omg. it actually somehow looks like.. something! rofl. yay!

then li ling also did it..!

and a few days ago, one of my side partial french braids i did in the office... (haha other interns plus the camera are my special mirrors)

and then this was on sunday- omg i scooped the roundest scoop of ice cream EVER. until when i came back with this, pipz just went :o and rofl. i win! hehe)

then ryan played car racing. haha he looks far too short, the wheel is prob like blocking half his vision..

and then me and isabella played time crisis! heh..

2008-09-09T21:08:00.006+08:00

i just had to put this convo here so i will remember it. hahahaha.

busy slacker says:
omg his pic ;p
busy slacker says:
he has become someone i imagined he would become
~raehui++// i give my life to honor this says:
whahahahahahahahahaha

busy slacker says:
and the grp pic of us from american club she put on facebook is the one where you were "cheated"
busy slacker says:
and i was not ready
busy slacker says:
...
busy slacker says:
and popo laughing
~raehui++// i give my life to honor this says:
HAHA
busy slacker says:
i told you a joke ;p so are u even more irritated now?

busy slacker says:
somehow i m reminded
busy slacker says:
or rather
busy slacker says:
started wondering
busy slacker says:
if

busy slacker says:
chilli fishballs

busy slacker says:
have the same effect if u read them
~raehui++// i give my life to honor this says:
omg.
busy slacker says:
so they do

a BIT of background info:
we were taking a group shot at american club and the camera was clicking away so much, so then pipz was like, "funny face. funny face." so im like "okok. do ah. dont cheat me ah. DONT CHEAT ME AH. okay.." and i did, and then suddenly pipz turned to me and was like, "why are you so... *camera clicks* ..scared of being cheated?" :

shootz.

2008-09-09T19:24:00.006+08:00

save me. i am. irritated. and getting more irritated. WHY. why. WHY. stop it. omg. STOP. stop making assumptions. and spreading them. pls.

2008-09-05T19:24:00.005+08:00

today was fun! haha time seemed to pass quite quickly, and we ate rather well.. haha. i ate breakfast in the car as usual, and then during our usual 1 hr morning coffee break i nabbed cup noodles from the pantry (all coz faith told me she was eating cup noodles and so she made me feel like eating it too! haha)

and then soon after we had our lunch break- we were supposed to go to central to eat ramen as li ling and i had a ramen craving (all coz leonard told me he ate ramen with his mentor the day before, thus making me suddenly feel like eating ramen- and i passed it on to li ling when i told her. rofl.)

but anyway there was a queue outside the ramen place so we went to the foodcourt upstairs and i nabbed some taiwanese chicken hot plate thing with rice and fishball soup! and then we went to get ice cream! surprisingly, the sea salt + caramel ice cream was quite nice so i nabbed it! :D then my mentor gave me sorta a lesson about ECM in his office and passed me some books and stuff to read/flip through and then after a while we had mooncakes from the pantry and then it was 6pm! woohoo dinner time and... weekend!!! :D

only thing is, my ulcer is very painful now. :((((( all coz i kept biting the inside of my cheek accidentally a few days back (once it gets bitten once and swells a BIT, it's just so hard to not bite it again while eating) sigh..

oh yeah! i'm gonna watch avril lavigne at the indoor stadium this sunday! whee. i hope against possibility that she doesnt do too many songs from her latest album! :/ hmmm.

2008-09-04T19:49:00.004+08:00

hmm im actually having fun doing my internship at wong partnership! hehe:D my first day was not bad! then we watched an italian opera at night!

and today (my second day) was fun! i like how they say the main purpose of the internship is to have a feel of what the firm is like, rather than doing stuff those temp staff do/ work etc. haha all the work ive ever done has been quite brainless and simple and quick! The associates giving me the work will always explain to me whats happening and all that but my task has always been brainless nevertheless. i gain knowledge but work simple. i like. :)

haha we had like self proclaimed 1 hour coffee break in the morning and then lunch (my mentor brought me out to a jap restaurant at central. oh ya, my mentor is very nice and sometimes call me to his office to chat abt random stuff) and then 1 hour afternoon tea break! we just sat in the pantry, about 5 of us each time, just talking about super random stuff (eg. the wonders of the life of a tai tai. i tell you, i want to marry a rich guy (who loves God, of course! :p ), and then work and then stop working together and do meaningful part time stuff like community work and fun stuff we enjoy together for the rest of our lives! hehe.)

and today jade visited and brought me... cakeeeeesssss!! :D i looove how she always feeds me desserts when i'm interning! and not only that, one dessert is never enough with jade around- she always brings multiple desserts! woohoo. :))))))))))))) speaking of which, i do kinda miss the cakes and cookies in london! hehe:D

The greatest love that anyone could ever know
That overcame the cross and grave to find my soul
And 'til I see You face to face and grace amazing takes me home
I'll trust in You

With all I am I'll live to see Your kingdom come
And in my heart I pray You'd let Your will be done
And 'til I see You face to face and grace amazing takes me home
I'll trust in You

I will live to love You
I will live to bring You praise
I will live a child in awe of You

You are the voice that calls the universe to be
You are the whisper in my heart that speaks to me
And 'til I see You face to face and grace amazing takes me home
I'll trust in you

You alone are God of all
You alone are worthy Lord
And with all I am my soul will bless Your name

2008-08-30T20:14:00.003+08:00

it rained again today:( i was supposed to play tennis with jamal hmphhh.

ive just started reading the bk, Morality: An Introduction to Ethics, by Bernard Williams. (thanks, belle for borrowing it for me!) it's our summer homework- to read the bk and write an essay. SIGH. but anyway, after reading like almost 20 pages of it, i have one conclusion.

Bernard Williams has a very confused mind.

2008-08-28T12:58:00.001+08:00

Bigger than the air I breathe
Deeper than the ocean deep
Higher than the stars above
You are

Brighter than the blazing sun
Louder than the screaming crowd
Stronger than the power of death
You are

In the heavens on the earth
There is no one like you God
And these words are not enough
To tell of who You are

Who can know the mind of God?
Who can understand Your ways?
And these words are not enough
To tell of Your great name

Your love can melt the hardest heart
Yor words can bring the dead to life
Nothing is impossible for You

Awesome God, Humble King
You terrify yet welcome in
Your glory echoes all around the world

You You You
There's always
You You You
Unbreakable
Unshakable
Unbeatable

You You You
There's always
You You You
Take the world
But give me You
Lord Jesus You

2008-08-27T20:56:00.001+08:00

"I need a best friend who is hot, who can keep up with me, and most of all, who is real and won't be a backstabber. I'm not leaving London until I find that amazing girl or guy who can meet the challenges of being my British bestie! I am so excited!" - Paris Hilton is launching a reality tv series, in search for a new British best friend.

omg. WHY.

2008-08-27T19:49:00.003+08:00

me and rosie made cookies today:)

2008-08-26T18:28:00.000+08:00

"when people in the world say that God is dead, what they're meaning is that religion is dead. " - Martin Smith

2008-08-24T09:34:00.002+08:00

you must be wondering why im blogging at such an unearthly hour. it's because i missed my supper last night and so i woke up this morning at like 8am or so, feeling too hungry to go back to sleep. sianzzzzzz.

yday i played table tennis with peishan, weichao and kai and it was quite fun! by the time i came back and bathed etc, it was about 12am- about bedtime for me, so i just went straight to sleep... sigh i thought table tennis wasnt that much of an exercise so i could skip supper but it was not to be. hmphhh.

medic is so amusing haha. but i rem one time i was laughing all by meself cos no one else found whatever it was funny and i was just thinking, oh derwzy, where art thou? hmph.

anyway just now i saw rocky all alone, all wet and lonely while buddy was bathing quite a distance away.. so i decided it was safe to get rockys bath towel and dry him so he wont catch a cold. so there i was, happily drying him and just starting to take pics of him coz he looked so cute and cosy...

when.

buddy suddenly DASHED in front of me, dripping wet, making rocky scurry into the house in a flurry. and then buddy also came into the house (STILL ALL WET BTW- he hasnt even shaken off the water himself!) and suddenly the floor was all wet, i was wet, my camera was wet (not too wet luckily).... and then buddy shook his water off right in front of me.......... arghhh. hello!? buddy!?!? and then when we finally got them out, rosie started drying buddy with his towel and rocky hid in a corner, totally petrified. :(((( and buddy was just guarding the distance between rocky and me. argh. not again.

2008-08-19T23:25:00.002+08:00

derwzy has left. hmphh.

but today me, ah du and pipz had afternoon tea at Bosses and ate until we were full and happy:)

and now im eating jack n jill salsa chilli potato chips. yayy :D

2008-08-16T21:37:00.004+08:00

today we went to ps and while waiting for ah du, rw and i randomly decided to play 3 games of arcade bball... 2 derwzies, dressed in rubbished clothes, playing arcade bball.... and we beat our high score again and again, and then... we finished the whole game. :o

haha we were like.... what?? omg. rofl. yeah babeh!

2008-08-15T15:46:00.003+08:00

and i can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on
and there will be an end to these troubles
but until that day comes
still i will praise you,
still i will praise you.

oh no, you never let go.

2008-08-14T23:55:00.004+08:00

today i had lotssssss of fun! went to sentosa! with auntie shirley, shannon, ryan, their maid and derwzy! :D yay we cycled and did fun stuff and ate beef burgers and pizza on the beach at night and then i built sandcastles with shannon, and sat on our castles, and saw fireworks and sat down on the sand to watch, and threw sand into the sea, and buried each others' feet and played a bit of catching (coz i kept burying her feet secretly and she was getting scared of crabs. hahahahah) and stole sea water and sea sand while running away from the splashing waves... and then while building one of the sandcastles together, shannon said, "tonight was very fun..." indeed it was. :)

and the super funny apart where rw and i were terrified but shannon was so calm and apparently enjoying herself.. hahaha she would be like, "eh look! loooook! _______ is so nice!" and rw and i were like *absolutely frozen* , "tsk, eh dont. stop moving. dont shake the thing..!" ahahaha! then we just looked at each other and laughed. cant help it. ahhahahah. (shannon gan gan said we're scaredy-cats. hahahah)

anyway ill org and post some pics another day!:) and oh ya yday i went to central and ps with derwzy and it was fun too! got lots of pics of derwzy, can create personal portfolio already. ahahha and then our family went out for thai food! yayyy:D

2008-08-12T23:09:00.002+08:00

yay i watched bball, gymnastics, fencing and a bit of swimming olympics! bball. US vs China- so unimpressive. china was not very good (physically not up to international standards lol) and US played badly and so messily. the whole game was messy and random. hardly any strategies or organisation lor. and then US kept missing all their treys. and then today i watched US vs Angola, which was a far better game. angola is actually not too bad la. US freethrows somehow couldnt make it- was like only slightly better than shaq's average- and their treys still couldnt make it. but then other than that they were quite impressive, especially physically omg. haha. (i hate how the 3 of us keep misusing that word.)

anyway lebron james was very impressive, and so was wade. LJ is so.. aggressively ji dong hahaha. but in a way that makes him impressive! lol. against china he blocked an opponent by just simply grabbing his shot in mid air with both hands! hahahaha. i have to say.. its... kinda.. insulting.

haha. and then when he blocks, omg he blocks super spectacularly! i rem today he blocked an opponent- omg rw and i both sooo saw him creeping ji dongly (what a paradox..) from behind and ji dongly jumping super high and... omg he blocked the opponent from behind! hahaha not even the person he was guarding but we so saw him ji dongly creeping!! and then he blocked so hard that im sure it was super embarrasing for the other guy. haha he just wacked the ball and then stared at the guy. omg. attitude man.

hahah. and his dunks are also quite power. that time a teammate alley-ooped to him and we were all thinking, "what kinda pass is that!" but before we could get the words outta our mouths, LJ somehow nabbed the ball and dunked it right in! wa hes somehow super energetic the whole time and he keeps saving the team at the start of the game. US never leads at the start of games lor. haha does that say something about its starters..? (ahem.. the Ks...)

anyway kobe and kidd and prince were the least impressive. hahah we were eating while watching the game and once, the commentator was like, "kobe bryant is an extremely good defender..." and my bro choked on his food. hahahah. and then kobe was like 0-7 field goal % at one pt and then he made some shot or something and the commentator actually gan gan said kobe was one of the best bballer players in the world right now and no one could guard him!!!!! hello!? haha and then we were like ".........skifhjiosmlijfoiwejiodj" and then derwzy was like, "yeah but kobe cant guard anyone either." hahahaha. omg we just couldn stop laughing at that. and he KEPT on trying to shoot threepters and KEPT on missing. dun think he made a single trey in the game la. dunno how many he tried omg.

haha and then i rem my bro saying, "hmmm how come shaq didnt make the olympic team ah?" HAHA we all just burst out laughing. lol. actually right, shaq went to suns(???) and they became worse (according to pipz), then kidd went to nets and they also became worse... and then kidd is in the olympic team right (ahem, i heard its so that the team can nab gold)... so actually theres some logic in that question right. hahahaha.

then men's gymnastics is.... unbelievable la. omg. theyre almost like inhuman. how can anyone ever do what they can do?! omg la. and fencing is quite funny, both players will alw celebrate after almost every time the buzzer sounds rofl. coz they dun even noe who poked first, everything happens so quickly! lol. china got gold for the sabre anyway. quite powerful..

anyway the other day rw and i went to NDP '08 and the black knights' (i think) performance was quite exciting! and then i successfully gave my hand balloon to a small boy- rw and i were sorta competing, who could get rid of our hand balloon first, by giving it to someone who wanted it. hahaha. we xing xing ku ku blow the stupid balloon lor! so hard to blow omg.. so we were both despoly scrutinizing every small child we walked past, to try and discover any single bit of interest in our balloons, but then rw gave up half way and left hers next to a bush and then shortly after, a small boy pted at my balloon and yesssssss i happily (kindly) gave it to him :p

we are so wu liao. i think im talking rubbish alr. im off now! :D

2008-08-06T21:20:00.002+08:00

omg. i dont remember doing this at all.

i googled my name out of boredom, and not only did i find out that there were flights from HUI to RAE, but also got reminded that there are lots of fun stuff that have long been detached from my memory..

this is from a certain bean's blog...

roughly dunno how many days ago, i went to taiwan, i bowl and bowl and bowl until i became a bowl. *that was pozzie who typed that ridiculous sentence, she's disturbing my thoughts! see what i meant by exhausted brainpower?*

my trip to taiwan was super miserable... apart form bowling, i did nothing... no shopping, no eating of nice food, no entertainment at all(except for the HBO channel). there was a horrible typhoon! i saw a signboard that said, "rae hui and pozzie rocks" being blown away by the typhoon and i immediately RAN AFTER IT, and caught it in mid-air, in a desperate attempt to keep it safe!!! i was SO RELIEVED THAT I CAUGHT IT, that i suddenly just totally broke down and cried my heart out!!! omg! THANK GOD!!!! thank you, thank you, thank you so much!!!! RAEHUI AND POZZIE!!!!!!! I LOVE U!!!!! hahahahahaha

buzzed at 9.40 am

oh ..the 2 earlier blogs are absoluely balooneye, rubbishy. pozzie and rae hui stole the keyboard form me! me! MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

buzzed at 9.53 am
--------------------------------------

the past few days have been not bad! :) lets see what i can remember.. yday we went to balestier to eat and then walked a bit at balestier pt or something. and i cant get the image of derwzy flapping her right arm- while eating her meepok because of the fly lingering around her- out of my mind. hahaha. and then derwzy gave me some words of wisdom.. "next time, if u dont understand what a guy is saying, think, first! __________ second! ___________. hahahaha. super funny.

then after swimming at tanglin club (american club's pool was too crowded) and getting traumatised when i reached the end of the pool once, looking up to see something that made my jaw drop, ah du and i proceeded to meet the rest at pines to eat jap food again and it was gd again but we ate the same nice stuff so i think im gonna get sick of the food there soon. lol. think ive enough of pines alr, for the time being.

hehe. and then coz i was wearing my swimming flip flops (derwzy had my heels for me to change into but she was alr inside the restaurant waiting), ah du was like, "nvm, just go in, they wont stop u. if they stop u, just say you are also wearing flip flops what!"

rofl i looked down and saw the waiters and waitresses all wearing white socks and jap flip flops. hahahaha omg!

anyway today we went to isetan in the afternoon and walked rocky and buddy as usual before our steamboat! yayy:)

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